I'll do better tomorrow {what it's like parenting in a pandemic}
I find myself laying in bed at night thinking to myself, I’ll do better tomorrow.
I think of the times throughout the day that I lost my temper with my daughter, was on my phone a ton, was short with my husband, and had the tv on too much.
I’ll do better tomorrow.
I’ll do better tomorrow.
I’ll do better tomorrow.
For those of you reading years from now, friendly reminder that a virus has spread globally without a vaccine or medicine. It is fatally dangerous to the elder and people with autoimmune disorders. We're literally parenting in a pandemic. Schools, restaurants {except drive thru’s and take out}, libraries - most everything closed or closed again, besides grocery stores and medical facilities. We have been told by virtually anyone with medical authority that we should not be closer than six feet to someone, called “social distancing” to help prevent the spread of the virus.
The world as we know it is a different these days, and for who knows how long.
I find myself wondering if we will go back to normal but push my thoughts somewhere else. I try not to think outside the walls of our home to focus on my family and not get myself too down. Call it naive, I call it trying to stay sane.Being confined to our homes, only being able to see friends and family on FaceTime. Social distancing has left us feeling lonely and depressed. We have to tell our kids that they can’t go to school - whether our decision or the district - or to their friends house to play. Luckily my four year old has likely forgotten what life used to be like. My eight month old only cares about eating, sleeping and why I’m not in the room with her. Most of us are not so lucky and find ourselves as homeschool teachers now, wearing many hats we have never worn before. We are our kid’s school teachers, coaches, church leaders, art teachers AND best friends these days (let that last one sink in for a second).
And then again I found myself laying in bed, negatively thinking “I’ll do better tomorrow.” I had to remind myself that this will likely never happen again.
My oldest daughter will never be home all day, every day with nothing to do. She’s heading off to kindergarten soon too, which is a whole other soft spot. My youngest daughter will never be eight months old again. My husband will never be working from home again, able to play with the girls during his breaks and have lunch as a family every day. This time is something to cherish, not wish away so we can get back to the hustle and bustle of our past lives. It makes you wonder - is a global pandemic what it took to make us SLOW DOWN and enjoy life, our kids, our husband, ourself (gasp) more?
PARENTING IS ROUGH RN: CityMom Liz spills her perspective on pandemic parenting too
I’m not a parenting expert by any means, but I have found a few tips to keep a sense of normalcy and break up the monotony to the days. My hitlist of pandemic parenting go-tos. Maybe these will help you - maybe they'll reinforce what you already know. I’m also not one to let all structure fly out the window so it’s helped me to have at least some semblance to one to help the days go by {I almost put “quicker” here but stopped myself} smoother.
Our days are divided into “blocks” that look like this:
8-10 - wake up, hygiene routine, breakfast, free play, TV
10-12 - structured activities - coloring, puzzles, crafts, music in the background, no TV during this time
12-1:30 - lunch, play before naps
1:30-4 - naps
4-5:30 - outside activity - walk/bicycle
5:30 - 7 - cook dinner, TV for kiddos while cooking, turn off TV for dinner
7-8 - bedtime routines
8-10 - spouse time {we’ve been watching the Marvel movies in chronological order}
And here are some general daily tips for parenting in a pandemic that have helped me power thru the days as best I can:
Do not stay in pajamas all day. Even if you wear yoga pants and a t-shirt, get dressed. This goes for kids too - our oldest loves putting on summer dresses even though we’re inside all day.
Brush your teeth
Take a shower
Cook at least one meal and enjoy as a family
Play music to avoid silence
FaceTime with one family member and one friend
Go outside for at least one hour
Attend a local business virtual meeting (church, museum, story time, etc)
Do one chore per day (involve your kids too - this can be a small organization project, laundry, clean one room, etc.) Don’t tackle everything at once - we have time.
Have a virtual happy hour with friends
We will get through this, dear friends. I know it.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Jeannie Marrugo was a full-time architect and has transformed into a full-time entrepreneur of two businesses that she runs with her family. She loves spending time with her Venezuelan hubby and chasing her half-Latina daughter, Camila. When she isn’t working or with family, she loves cycling, camping {which seemed to stop after parenthood came} reading, shopping, watching movies, and running the business she co-founded with her mom, Cafe Baby.
